NEW Year — NEW YOU!

Happy New Year! As much as we believe things have changed even in the last year, if we’re truly honest with ourselves, many important things that trouble us most remain the same (or possibly they are worse).

Relationships rank high on the list of human needs. When things go awry, life becomes more difficult, we are less free to be ourselves, and to enjoy the company and special times with those near and dear that give life deeper meaning and greater joy.

As we come into the New Year with thoughts of a fresh start, renewal, and hopeful possibility, this is a great time to consider how we might work toward restoration, repairing brokenness and loving others more radically — perhaps as never expected.

Emotions reliably stir as we enter a New Year. Reviewing the last 365 days, happy memories come to mind. They warm us in the January chill. They give us hope for the days ahead. 

Painful thoughts inevitably come on the heels of bliss-filled remembering, coloring our yesterdays in darker hues. They remind us of where we’ve been. If we allow, they’ll  dictate where we’ll stay in the days stretching out before us.

At the dawning of a new year, many becoming misty-eyed reflecting on events of the recent past. Reviewing mountaintop moments, great joys, incredible accomplishments, happy times, they also carefully inspected their disappointments, tragedies, setbacks, and personal shortcomings. We’ve all experienced sweet moments and difficult times over the last 10 years!

Hope for the days ahead fuels beautiful dreams of what is yet to be. It can be a way forward for us, as a catalyst for the change we hope to live. Not just in personal improvement, but also in life and our broken relationships. 

Winston Churchill said: “The farther back you can look, the farther forward you are likely to see.” There is wisdom in these words. Applied properly, considering past events can give us perspective on important life matters.

Reviewing what got us to where we are is an integral step in making essential life changes. Dwelling on the past promises to hold us there. Steeping in the sadness of overwhelm immobilizes us. As much as we desire to escape the unrelenting pain, we will remain stuck.

‘Understanding’ or trying to figure out a troubling relational situation can be helpful, but a clear view of a matter is not always possible. Things happen in life we’ll never understand. Lingering too long in trying to make sense of what doesn’t, holds us back on what is yet to be, or who we may become. 

It’s important to look back and learn from the past. In fact, “history” can never truly be erased — because it happened😉It can be and is an insightful source of understanding and learning for our lives. 

Thinking it’s all “in the past,” by complacently believing we can ‘shelve’ it because it’s unimportant, or we can’t do anything about a relational break, never addresses the issue. It remains, glaring at us, impatiently awaiting attention, even when we can rightfully claim “no fault” in causing the incident. 

Focusing on the past can keep us stuck in the place we want to free ourselves from. Don’t dwell on it, friend😊Instead, look to the possibilities ahead and relationships to be mended. Our future is not found in our past. Our future may in part be shaped by what has happened, but going back to linger too long is not the direction to focus on, as we look to move ahead. 

ZigZiglar said: “How you see the future is much more important than anything that has happened in your past.” In other words, the past may shape us and to an extent “the now, “ but it does not dictate our everyday —  unless we allow it. 

Our dreams, hopes and desires for a brighter, better future and strong relationships with others are always possible. How do you see these things in your life? I’m hoping for more rekindled friendships and restored broken places this new year!

Eventually we realize ‘letting go’ of the thing (NOTE: not the person — unless it involves abuse or risks personal safety) that binds us to an impossible situation is the only way to move forward. We know we will stay stuck otherwise. Grace for the matter (and those involved) is required. A change of heart in us is what’s needed. That’s where the transformation to live more in love and freely extending grace begins.

Of all the changes and good things we hope for in this New Year, may we enter the days ahead filled with the hope of things that are possible.      

We can begin to take steps toward relational restoration and reclaiming needed peace and joy in life. May we embrace the adventure we call life by living a truly radical life. May it often contradict conventional thinking (by the world’s standards), as we set our intentions to live in love and walk in grace every minute of every day.

Through a changed heart, we see things differently. When the pain is too piercing to continue, hanging on to it becomes too great. Then we can see our way clear of it. This is the path to #forgiveness and by following it, we are on our way to restoring life’s broken places♥️I’m on the Road to Forgiveness too — are you with me?

More about forgiveness and building healthy relationships:

♥️See “What if tomorrow never comes”: https://youtu.be/IheYohCcjT8

If you only read 1 book this year — I recommend reading RESTORING THE BROKEN PLACES IN AN UNFORGIVING WORLD, to help you build healthy relationships and mend life’s broken places!

Restoring the Broken Places in an Unforgiving World is available for sale in any bookstore — your favorite local shop, indie, brick-and-mortar! Ask for it, if you don’t see it, please!

Restoring-the-Broken-Places-revised

Available on Amazon: 

📖Paperback: https://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B08LJ9TL3L/

📱Kindle eBook: https://www.amazon.com/Restoring-Broken-Places-Unforgiving-World-ebook/dp/B08KFNWVST/

📖📚☕️Retailers and Online Booksellers: https://www.restoringthebrokenplaces.com/livradpublishing-featured-author-becky-cortino/

Check Your Love Quotient

? Valentine’s Day — or maybe any day?

Love is in the air!

Unless it isn’t.

Do you know what your Love Quotient is?

❤️‍? Relationships rank high on our priority list, yet we often struggle with them most of our lives. Sometimes we’re not sure how to handle a troubling matter. Maybe even an everyday situation is a thorn in your side. If you’re really invested in your relationships and yourself, check your Love Quotient!

❣️ What is your Love Quotient?❣️

  Take my quiz to find out!

? How this Quiz works: as soon as your request is submitted, you will receive a link to pick up your copy of the Love Quotient Quiz

DAY #1: You’ll receive the Quiz to download, print out if you like, and answer it privately. (Look for the first email from me after you confirm your request.)

DAY #2: To review your answers, a Love Quotient Quiz Results eBooklet will be sent to you the next day.

DAY #3: The following day, you’ll get a self-scoring Love Quotient Quiz Scorecard, to see how you scored! 

Quizzes are FUN, aren’t they?! We can learn a lot about ourselves, especially when we consider our answers as we go through them.

I sincerely hope you will enjoy this quiz and find it interesting!

Request your copy of the ?Love Quotient Quiz?

Only three very simple steps to discover yours!

    ? Request yours here:  http://LoveQuotientQuiz.LivRad.com/

New Beginnings

The New Year stretches out before us as a clear slate of fresh beginnings, great opportunities, hopes, dreams and wonders to be discovered…

What do you hope for in your life? The New Year is recognized as the time in our calendar year as a season for everything becoming new again. Fortunately for all of us, fresh starts and new beginnings aren’t scheduled only for January 1st!

New Beginnings are launched when we take steps in the right direction toward our heartfelt desire.

Becky Cortino

Relationships rank high on most people’s priority list, and yet this area remains as one of life’s most daunting challenges. Our days become complicated as we attempt to navigate through issues, desire to deftly address touchy issues and try to smooth over painful moments.

Have you added relationships to your list to focus on in the New Year? Many people place relationships at the top of their list. They begin their initiative armed with all good intentions and great resolve to deal with troubling relational messes.

Often, the thought of approaching a pain-filled area in life causes even the most resolute to freeze in place. Immobilized, the whole situation becomes increasingly more confusing as hurt, deep sorrow and bad memories blend into a chaotic mix. Progress in moving toward resolution comes to a screeching halt. Fear sets in. Where to begin? How to handle this? I just can’t do this!

Seeking to address relational breaks requires us to revisit times and places we’d prefer to keep on a shelf somewhere safely out of sight. In reviewing those breaks, the deep root of a problem inevitably stirs powerful emotions.

It’s difficult to cast aside the happy life we’ve comfortably surrounded ourselves with, to make time and create space for mending a break or to admit a wrong. But take heart! In our walk with Him, God often takes us through life’s dark, rough terrain before we arrive on the other side with Him, where we find true peace and the joy we seek.

How can you embrace New Beginnings in your life and effectively apply them to restoring broken relationships?

  • Recognize the situation for what it is in reality — not what you think, or how you feel about it. Admit it exists. See it for what it is.
  • Pray about the matter, all involved and touched by it. Ask God for a clear vision of the problem, and for His guidance in addressing it. He will change your heart in every aspect surrounding this issue! When we change our heart about a painful situation, our eyes see it more clearly.
  • Seek His guidance throughout. He is always with us. He stands beside us and will bring us through. We have to be willing participants wherever He leads us. We have to do our part — to do the hard things. He makes the way clear for us.
  • Let your reset heart redirect your mind, acting as a spiritual GPS, directing you where to go. Begin taking steps toward resolution, as the Lord leads you in that direction. His restoration will be far more complete and well beyond what you could ever imagine!

Forgiveness and restoring life’s broken places takes time.

When we want to restore a relationship or fix a problem in life, it helps to remember it is a process. It’s never a one-and-done or easy peasy cure for what ails us relationally. Sometimes it takes a lifetime. But forgiveness is possible.

Let the Holy Spirit lead you in this. Don’t take personal initiative to map out your relational restoration plan or detail this project on your calendar. This is a matter of the heart — carry it with you. Let the matter (and those involved) come to your mind frequently. Allow it to be laid on your heart and cover all with prayer.

Every small step you make toward restoration is a step forward.

Progress is made, moving toward that hope. Realize relationships involve more than “self,” so moving forward (or not) rests also in the hands of other(s). They may not wish to relinquish their control or admit wrong. Our heartfelt endeavors to restore broken places shaped by the Lord’s leading, will us free of our pain.

RESOURCES:

♥️ Read More about Forgiveness

❤️‍? Becky Wants to Know: What is your #1 Forgiveness question/concern/challenge/problem?

MEDIA:

? Listen to this content on LivRad The Podcast with Becky Cortino — on Your Fav Podcast Platform on App!

? Apple Podcast episode here

? Spotify Podcast episode here

? YouTube Podcast episode here

Loving Through Imperfect Hospitality

The heart of imperfect hospitality is offered in love, to encourage and give comfort. Hospitality doesn’t come easy, but it isn’t difficult…

What a blessing to spend time, share life and discuss adventures when we gather with others! Afterward, we wonder why don’t I spend more time enjoying company? It’s easy to get caught up in our daily routine and miss life-enriching moments. A nagging “To Do” List captivates our attention. Making preparations for having company isn’t always on the list.

Hospitality doesn’t come easy, but it isn’t difficult. Perceived urgency of things we need to do weighs heavily on us. We feel overwhelmed with everything on our plate. Adding a new thing displaces something else already planned. Because we make hospitality grander then it needs to be in our heads, we keep ourselves from enjoying more beautiful moments in our lives.

Opportunities to show gracious hospitality arise when we cross paths with others. It may be as simple as warmly welcoming someone to an event or engaging in conversation. A kind introduction helps newcomers join an ongoing conversation.

Sometimes hospitality opportunities are dropped in our laps. Our latest experience was having family live with us for almost 1-1/2 years. This indeed was a time for imperfect hospitality in action because it was impromptu hosting from beginning to end!

If you had family (or others) living with you during the pandemic and worked full-time, you remember the drill. Each day brought changing protocols, new mandates, dwindling food supplies and staples impacting households everywhere. (Who knew toilet paper was so valuable?) Maybe like us, you felt the increased weight of responsibility for providing for those under your roof as shortages continued. We all pressed on through those uncertain days.

We had “company” when our youngest son and his new wife lived with us during the pandemic. For 16 months running, all efforts were made to help them settle in comfortably. With our family’s work and school schedule, my main focus was gathering nightly for a family meal. This gave us the opportunity to spend some personal time away from pressing matters.

We had 3 reasons for planning our daily family evening meal:

  1. It is our family’s tradition.
  2. Gathering gave us a space of time together.
  3. This would likely be one of the last times we could spend time together in such an intimate, meaningful way.

Meshing schedules proved challenging. For the first 9 months of sheltering in, I was the last one awake (in the wee hours) finishing things needing to be done; and the first one up in the early morning, setting up for the day.

For 4 months I worked full-time, as I prepared for a speaking conference. After putting in 8-9 hours straight through the day, I spent about 2 hours making dinner, followed by another 2 hours of cleanup (most nights). It was a full, exhausting day, but I was dedicated to having this important time together. It was worth it.

My conference was postponed when gathering mandates were enacted. I worked intensively during the next 6 months preparing for it. In the end, respecting my family’s concerns for bringing COVID home, I didn’t attend the rescheduled conference. I did accomplish a lot during those 10 months!

My husband and I remained committed to providing a roof over our children’s heads, keeping them safe, providing food for them. This is the kind of loving hospitality a parent willingly provides. Our school and work schedules changed somewhat during the summer, but we continued to gather.

Getting adequate rest was challenging for everyone! Focusing on our evening meal mission helped, especially in the face of adversity as satan attempted to disrupt our family’s lives. I realize now I was also battling burn-out, after launching my book RESTORING THE BROKEN PLACES IN AN UNFORGIVING WORLD.

We continued serving food, providing hospitality, love, wisdom, support and encouragement in the face of the unknown. I believe this is the heart of imperfect hospitality — offered in love, to encourage and give comfort. It is offered from the heart with the hope of comforting. In this situation it was my husband and I assuring our children of the beautiful future God has planned for them.

I’m grateful for every moment our family had during this challenging time. It was a blessing to serve them in this way. Living a faith-based life assures us our heavenly Father is greater than our circumstances. He is the solution to all pressing problems. In His undeniable love, He never leaves us to deal with challenges on our own. He brought our family through those dark days.

The beautiful future God planned for all of our children is dawning. We know our prayers are being answered in amazing ways for them!

Open your heart for gracious gatherings with imperfect hospitality.

OPEN YOUR HEART WITH THIS TOOLBOX FOR GRACIOUS GATHERINGS WITH IMPERFECT HOSPITALITY:

  • Preparing favorite meals and special foods for restricted diets and preferences is thoughtful and welcoming.
  • Give guests a taste of your family’s life by serving family favorites to new family members or visitors from other countries, along with a generous helping of backstory of why the dish is so popular or special memories associated with it.
  • Pray ahead for the gathering, asking each to be blessed.
  • Try to get rest beforehand.
  • Keep arrangements simple, so they are not all-consuming.
  • Focus on creating a warm, welcoming environment.
  • No matter how simple, offer it all in love.
  • Cover all (including your efforts) with grace — things don’t always turn out as planned!
  • Memories will be made through your efforts of graciously offered (yet) imperfect hospitality.

MORE:

The Bible provides guidance on opening our hearts and homes.

Are you (or someone you know) experiencing challenges in the wake of COVID? You May be interested in reading: How Are YOU… Really?